Where's your father???

Warning: this post is dripping with self pity.

It's fathers day and there is no father here.

He has gone and left us. He is driving to Idaho as we speak - um, as I type....

Work has taken him from us and he went so willingly. I wouldn't be so upset about it EXCEPT for the little bitty fact that his destination is 1/2 mile from my mothers house. And I miss her SO MUCH!

I've always hated Fathers Day. I had a dad - once. But he really messed up his life and messed up my life. He was criminal. He was abusive. So Happy Freakin Fathers Day wherever you are. It's not that I don't forgive you - I even feel sorry for you. But I just can't keep subjecting myself to your illness. If I were an alcholic I'd go drinking right about now. But I'm not. And I have responsibilities to take care of so I'll continue to smile and keep my house in order and give my children the security that they need to become happy functioning adults.

I'm going to sit on my newly manucured lawn, throw some meat on the bar-b and enjoy the company of my friends. They just adopted a second child and they are willing to come and be with us on Fathers Day whilst my husband and father of my children is out of town. It shouldn't be so hard for me but it is. Thanks for sharing your fathers day with me.

Oh and Mom.... Happy Fathers Day.

OH - If you can't tell I am an advocate for families that consist of both a father and a mother..... Have sex with whomever you want - gay's lesbians - it's your right but don't be so selfish to bring children into that. Where would you be without a father and a mother?

That's all I'm saying about that.


Jami said...

Amen, sista! I'm sorry to hear you had such a rough growing up but the way I see it, you wouldn't be the wonderful, happy, strong, independent woman you are today without it! ;) Love ya!

Scrappy Girl said...

I hope you turn your Father's Day lemons into lemonade. Have a fun bbq!

Devri said...

What a great post!

hey, go enter my giveaway for a chance to win a apple ipod touch!


islandgirl said...

Oh Jessica, this post makes me want to laugh and cry for you at the same time! I'm sorry it was hard Fathers Day for you. Cheer up though, things all worked out in the end, right? You got Ralph! Fun song, lol! HUGS! I'll be thinking of you and hoping things go well with all of your life changes happening right now. Sure wish we lived closer, ever consider moving to Utah? LOL!

!!The Obnoxious SAHM!! said...

you and i have very similar lives with our fathers. my parents recently divorced and he has taken a turn of pure abandonment to his family. heartbreaking as yesterday was, I still tried (and failed) making a day a good one for my husband who is a great dad.

thanks for following me. :) I am your newest :)

Kerri said...

I'm sorry your fathers day was so bad. I hopeyou were able to have a good timeat the bbq. And hopefully your husband made it up to you guys.

Kaye Butler said...


I love that last paragraph. Amen Sista!!!!!!!

RhondaLue said...

no father 'round here...but because he died. He's missed and I feel slightly sorry for myself but more sorry for those men that COULD have been good & meaningful influences in the lives of their kids and chose not to.